Bangkok November 2012

 It is saturday morning of my day four in Bangkok. I awake at three after forcing my self to stay awake until eight like the nights before. I accept this as a good night's sleep. Besides, it is two hours later in Japan where I will be in three days so ten to five is a good night's sleep. I am grateful for my sixty year old body to be this healthy and resilient to allow for enough rest to enjoy each day's moments.  I decide to go for an early morning walk with the hope that I may be amongst the orange robed monks carrying their layered food containers traveling to fill them with food gifts.  I do not meet any but know in my mind and memory they are with me but more likely on more rural streets.  I am grateful for the brightly lit spirit houses and the Erawan four face Buddha to remind me of their memory.  As I pass the four face Buddha whose gate has not yet opened, I notice a fellow early traveler cusping his hands in prayer to the four face Buddha.  I wait my turn and do the same.  Even though I do not consider my self a Buddhist,  I only have the chance to gain goodness by this act of respect in this culture I am blessed to be welcomed into.

I sit now in a comfortable seat in the Intercontinental Hotel enjoying my second cup of coffee and a delicious pastry put out as a gift for this hotel's  guests. No one questions my cover as a guest.

I sit in stillness thinking about my messages from the Ojah yoga retreat I experienced only last week, take time to be still, to meditate and breathe and expel all thoughts, a most difficult task but one worthwhile.

The first sky train of the day passes outside the large hotel windows above me and I imagine my day ahead to travel to the weekend market.

To stillness. The light of day is gradually showing its face. If my thoughts will not go away, I turn them to gratitude. To be able to take this journey and not feel I need to check in with any person or obligation. To let go of worries and concerns to the outside world. To reach a state of awareness to self and realize there is so much joy and contentment when we go to this place.

A message from Uma, one of the Ojah retreat speakers:  To learn to empathize not sympathize and to resist taking on another's pain.

The trees are silowettes against the dawn of the morning sky. I'm reminded of the beautiful sunrises and sunsets over the ocean viewed from our California balcony.

Stillness to meditate
with eyes wide open.
To slow down to observe
what is not normally seen
When too occupied
with the outside world
with thoughts of the past
and projections for the future.
To be still to see
the present moment.

I notice the sound of voices getting louder, more are awake to greet the day at 6 am.  I look up and the leaves of the trees are visible and the light of day is almost in full bloom.

The monk, my monk, greeted me as I stepped  into the early morning streets of Bangkok surrounded by high end stores like Louis Vuitton and the ageless culture symbolized by the spirit houses and the monk walking in front of me. I could see several other monks in front of him and across the street. I was pleased to be surrounded by them and no one else on these streets of dawn except the food vendors setting up their stands.

My walk hastened with my joy of this moment  as I passed by my monk smiled in return to my smile. A bit embarrassed to be the traditional tourist,  I asked to take his picture.  He kindly obliged, posing in front of one of Bangkok's high end store fronts. In return for his kind act and because I had always heard of but never experienced gifting monks food, their only susatance for their time in the monkhood, I bought food from one of the street vendors and placed it in his bowl. Gazing into his empty bowl, I noticed baht, the Thai currency, at the bottom so I placed a fifty baht bill along side it. He thanked me with a quiet "kap Kuhn ka" with bowed head. The food stall lady behind me said "you will have good luck madam"

At the weekend market.  I'm at a stall in front of a fan drinking fresh lemonade. My sweat is drying now to give me comfort from the heat. I have no idea if I will find it back to the sky train station but my mind reminds me not to worry and enjoy the moment. I feel like I am experiencing Bangkok  more fully then when I lived here. I think I came here to the weekend karakul market  a few times those years but it was a long trip through traffic in those days without  the sky train. I went to these kind of markets with the weaving alleys growing up in pakistan. It is wonderful to have these memories brought to the surface. I'm searching for beads and don't know if I'll find them but am grateful for the beautiful Thai people trying to guide me and the treasures I'm finding along the way.  My knowledge of Thai and my ability to replicate the tones  is coming to the surface.  I have even remembered how to ask someone's name.  My grandson would be proud of me because he has complimented this trait of mine to ask someone's name. I learned this from my very caring boyfriend george and do feel it is a form of showing love and a kind act.

I feel a relationship between this experience and education.  These values that are brought to the service are what are naturally held in the young child, slowing down to live in the present moment. This is a innate value in our children well worth our support as an adult.